So...Now What.

Time has been acting very strange lately, creeping slowly, and speeding past me before I can grasp it, it slips through my fingers and all I want to do is hold it tightly.

Making sense of the past three months has been and will continue to be a challenge. So many sights my eyes have taken in and given to my brain to try and make sense of, and when it can’t it gets passed on to my heart, where they will sit now, forever.

There are many things I do not understand about this experience, I feel overwhelmed thinking about the amount of suffering, the injustice I have had the unfortunate privilege to see first hand. I understand it to be a privilege because few will see it for themselves, and that is not a responsibility I take lightly, I am involved now, I am ruined, the nameless have been named and I will not forget them.

With all that I am trying to figure out now, with all that I do not understand, there has been a few things I know I know, about God, my world, and the person I want to be in it.

I know I want to be a woman of action. I will live out what I speak; I will not just speak words without moving. 

I want to create something out of nothing, to never stop building. When I create, something inside me starts to feel fulfilled, to make, do, form, fashion, construct, produce, generate, invent, design, satisfies my heart.

I want to be a person of promise. When I speak a word, I will mean it and will not go back on it.

I know God makes promises and they are always kept and always good. And he is an amazing provider of all of my needs and anything bad that happens to me is for his glory. I never leave my dads thoughts, I am resting in his beautiful arms, and I am blessed.

I know my fathers heart is broken by what he sees, I know he wants to see his children in action, fighting each others battles, standing in the gap, living in harmony, and as a part of this family, I have been called, you have been called. We are all called.

I know that I will never be the same.

A Controlled Situation

 

How foolish are we to think for one second that we are in control of our lives. That we decide, plan or choose anything.

We were late, not at all on schedule; the day was not going according to plan already, not our plan at least. I had been in Zambia for 2 weeks and was looking forward to a relaxing weekend spent with familiar faces. A group of us had planned to go to a game park for a picnic and swim. The ride that was coming to pick us up early Friday morning did not arrive until around 12 in the afternoon. We had planned on leaving early in the morning, it didn’t bother me at all though, it just gave me more time to get to know the team. A team from the UK had arrived earlier in the week, consisting of 3 young adults and 3 middle-aged volunteers, all wonderful people who accompanied us to the park. In my vehicle were Etienne and Rani along with their 3 children, Dominique, Hedassah, and 4-year-old Joshua. Etienne and Rani are long time volunteers who live in Zambia. Bentley and Alisha as well as my roommate Mel were also in the car. Adam, who serves hands in DRC, was in the vehicle with the team. After much delay we set off on our hour-long drive to the park, which turned into a lot longer of a treck as we took take a major detour to get some Petro. We finally made it to the park very hungry and spent our day in the sun, picnicking, swimming and enjoying everything God made. Wrapping up our day we decided to go for a drive to see some animals, that’s when all the delays started which apparently weren’t delays at all, just Gods plan unfolding.

First we couldn’t find Etienne, he went on a walk and was taking a while, and then we waited for Bentley and Alisha to return the canoe we had rented and to change out of their wet clothes. We finally decided to leave without Etienne and come back to look for him after our drive. We saw the beautiful giraffes and other animals and returned after about an hour, only to find Etienne had not returned, and the team in the car behind us had stopped a ways back to look at a tree and take some pictures. After another half hour delay we were together again and ready to leave the park… But not before dropping by the owner of the parks house, to play with her new lab puppies.

When we finally left, the moon was rising, full and yellow, as the sun gracefully descended. We started to get comfortable in our seats, knowing we were in for a long ride home. Joshua snuggled up on my lap; I turned on my iPod to a calming folk tune, let out a sigh, satisfied and content with that after beach day feeling.

We were speeding down the highway when I saw it.  The events that transpired for the next four hours seemed to happen in the blink of an eye and in slow motion. Far down the road I saw the brightest, biggest raging fire. It blocked the road completely; we were the first car in line behind it, first on the scene. A passenger bus carrying about 60 people collided head on with a truck. Which would have been horrible enough as it was, but the truck was carrying canisters of gasoline. Upon initial impact, which we were only 2 minutes away from witnessing, some people panicked and jumped out the bus windows, breaking through glass and falling on the hard cement, they were the ones we tried to save, they were the lucky ones, the others were left to burn alive on the bus.

Once we took in the image of the bright burning bus we reacted, Etienne ran towards the flames to see if there were any survivors. This sent the children into hysterical crying and panic. Mel and I did what we could to keep them calm. Rani, who was driving, moved toward the blaze, that’s when the explosions began. The fire started to catch the scattered canisters of gas. I have never been more afraid, the sight and the sound is hard to describe, so loud and bright like an atomic bomb. Each blast followed by screams filled with fear. I began to pray saying over and over again, “you are in control, you are in control, you are in control”. Our vehicle emptied and within seconds and without words we all took a role. Without direction or discussion we moved. Knowing we couldn’t rely on emergency service and we were in a remote area and TIA (This is Africa), some of us became police, some paramedics, traffic control and whatever else was needed.  People were scattered all around the road, desperate and battered, it looked and sounded like a war zone with the explosions continuing in the distance. 

My role was comforter. I stayed in the car with the kids, praying and singing songs over the boom of the raging fire.  We began to bring people into our cars, those who were badly injured we treated as best we could and sent in vehicles to the nearest hospital, which was a grueling hours drive away. The rest we treated and tried to calm down. We prayed with them, tried to keep them warm and prevent them from going into shock. I held a woman who was traumatized and whaling in one arm and Joshua in the other, who was calm and strong, showing no signs of a scared four-year-old boy.

God supplied us with everything we needed, enough blankets, towels and painkillers to go around. He supplied us with peace, strength and courage.

We prayed, treated wounds, directed and listened for what felt like a short time, a flash, a dream, when we finally left in was midnight and the ambulance had arrived to take back those who did not survive.

I was shaken. I was speechless, in awe. I could not believe the timing of it all. If things had gone slightly different, had we not been delayed so many times, we could have been 2 minutes closer and involved in the accident in very different way.

 I slept and woke up in a state of disbelief, did that really happen? It wasn’t a disturbing and horrible dream? A movie?

It felt like a slap in the face, a wake up call. How could I have ever been so arrogant as to think that for even one second I am in control of my life? He decides our coming and going. He is in control.

God orders the footsteps of the righteous man.

Just a thought I had.

Hello Friends,

I have been thinking about this latley and wanted to write it out. Hope it does some good...

 Am I the only one who is sick of me?  Me, me, me! My life! My future! Me, My, I! It would seem to me like much of the world is rather obsessed.

If I look at the church of the western world specifically, seems like most of the messages we hear are self-help or feel good messages. I think we focus a lot on what we need and what we want. Will we ever feel fulfilled? What’s missing? I think we have been equipped for decades, but have not been radical about stepping out, we desperately want to grow and see change in our lives and in our walks with God and are frustrated when we get stuck on a rut.

 I believe the way to see that happen is to take ALL the focus off YOU. Seems counterintuitive, I know.  I truly believe if we took the focus off of ourselves and put it on everyone around us our lives would change dramatically.

Our friends and family first, then other people, people who are in need, desperase situations around us…  that’s when you will see change and growth in yourself.  I think the culture we live in is very inwardly focused. Examine the things that you pray for, are most of your prayers focused on yourself, your insecurities, your fears, your problems? Imagine taking a week and only allowing yourself to prayer for and about others. I think that if we shifted our focus off ourselves and place it on others, that is when you see transformation. Outward Christianity does more for you inwardly than inwardly Christianity ever could.

So I want to challenge you to only prayer for others for an entire week. Don’t let yourself say the words “I” or “Me” when you’re praying, instead use “They”, “Them”, “us” and “we”. Even if you are going through a struggle or hard time, take a break from praying for you. See what happens.

Humbly,

Carly Honeybunn

Hello Friends and Family,

Where to begin, I have been blogging in the evenings in my room since I arrived and saving them to my computer with intentions of uploading them when I got the chance to go on the internet. I have the internet now and I am going to upload them all for you to read, just bear in mind the fact that these are from when I first arrived, so a lot of it is old and some irrelevant. Just wanted you guys to be able to read it and see some of the stuff we have been up to. It’s nothing to deep or insightful, I mainly wrote down what we did each day so I wouldn’t forget. There will be more to come as I have the chance to sit down and really reflect about my time here so far.

Thanks everybody,

We love you and miss you.

Carly Honeybunn

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Date: Unknown

            We are currently sitting in the furthest most point in Munich Airport.  What a journey it has been thus far. 

Yesterday?:   

We packed up our bags and headed to the airport.  When we got there to check in we were met by an angel in an Air Canada uniform.  All of our suitcases were VERY over weight and we were facing some hefty baggage fees.  That is when our angel with the red lipstick and blue eye-liner stepped in and said “you do realize you each have 2 free check bags…” Needless to say we didn’t pay a cent, yet.  Carleigh’s parents bought us a suitcase to share and we quickly began to rearrange our suitcases in the middle of the airport.  Clothes were flying and things were left behind L  After teary goodbyes we were off to T-dot.

            The flight to Toronto was quick and painless.  We enjoyed our in flight entertainment and were still excited to be on a plane.  In the airport we had our last taste of Tim Horton’s and waited for a short time in our gate.  There we met our first friend – Nameless.  He was an older man on his way to Munich to do some business.  We chatted about many things from linguistics to romance. 

            Before we knew it we were on our way to Munich.  The flight was just over 8 hours but it felt like a lifetime.  It is amazing how big those seats can make you feel and how uncomfortable you can be.  Between the 2 of us we got a combined 4 hours sleep. 

Never underestimate the power of jetlag.

Today: Munich

            We arrived in Munich around 11am while our friends back home were warm and safe in their beds.  Our entire bodies ached.  We told each other it was ok to whine for now.  With our heads a blur we tried to navigate the huge airport.  Due to the whether conditions we were unable to explore Munich this time around.  After making our decision to stay inside we wandered aimlessly from one area to the next.  It is a shame there wasn’t a camera crew following us around because that footage would have been blackmail-able.  It was an emotional rollercoaster.  We would sit in one place for an hour; agree on a plan only to end up on some other bench for another 2 hours.  We recognized our inability to make good decisions, so we decided to take a nap.  We found an empty row of chairs, snuggled up to our belongings and dreamt of home, missing our flights and much more.  We finally washed up in the bathroom, and walked all the way to our gate.  We read that Munich airport was one of the coolest in the world, but we couldn’t find anything that we read about due to our condition.  We may not have found the golf course or the lookout tower, but we did have a few cases of the giggles; example: Marveled at a huge airplane that pulled up outside the airport. Stating “That’s actually the biggest airplane I have ever seen!” Only minutes later an airplane 3x the size slowly crept into our peripheral vision. We laughed until we cried. NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THE POWER OF JETLAG.

The Carlyeighs

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Feb 11^th

Wow.

I am not sure how to communicate my thoughts and feeling adequately with you guys back at home. Partially, because I am overwhelmed, and partially because I am in an intense state of jet lag.

 Is it too early to say I can already tell I want to come back?

Carleigh and I left Munich yesterday and arrived at Johannesburg around lunch time.

 Our plane ride was 10 hours and we actually managed to get a few hours of sleep in. Then we landed and our baggage came, (such a relief.) After that however, we made our first rookie mistake. We had our bags on a trolley and were searching for the check in and our gate. We tried our best to look as though we were on a mission, it must have failed because a porter swept in out of nowhere and started pushing our bags. Carleigh looked back at me and we realized we would have to tip him. He tried to get us to pay through the nose but we held our ground, he did end up helping us out a lot. At Johannesburg we met up with Mel Neilands, a fellow Canadian arriving in our same intake (who is, as it turns out, my roommate!) She is very sweet and we have already said it feels like we have known each other forever. (She loves tea, specifically “Forever Nut”…My favorite tea!)

We then flew from Johannesburg to Nelspruit (only a 45 min plane ride, which felt like 10min to us). We met up with Jen at that airport and she drove us... On the wrong side of the road! It was very nerve racking. This Province is Beautiful, Rolling hills and valleys. Carleigh and I pinched each other a couple times. It’s very humid and sticky, no air conditioning in our rooms or in the kitchen, we may be sweating for the next 3 months straight. Today the temperature was +42 degrees Celsius with humidity.

Quick version of what happened for the rest of the day:

-looked around our rooms (which had welcome chocolates and a fresh vase of yellow roses)

-Met the other girl who is here and is Carleigh’s roommate. Her name is Emily and she came here right after she graduated high school, by herself! She seems like an absolutely amazing and beautiful human being! I already feel like I have known these girls for a long time.

-unpacked my suitcase and accidently fell asleep

-went up the path to Jen and Dan’s house for “curry night”. Jen and Dan moved her 3 years ago from London and have 3 of the cutest boys in the world, Marley, Sonny and Micah. I will try and post pictures of them sometime. At supper we met a lot of the people who are involved with Hands. It was like going to a family gathering and I felt welcomed right away. Everyone looks out for one another, it’s a beautiful thing.

-Learned about Frogs, lizards, spiders and snakes! Yes they have all of those here and many more. The frogs are everywhere at night time and Carleigh has already made friends with a spider in her room. I am hoping never to meet a snake because they are poisonous.

- Both of us have major canckles. Our ankles and feet look and feel huge! Its embarrassing and comical.

After curry night me and Mel and Carleigh met at the kitchen/common area and talked for a couple hours. It was nice. Tomorrow we will be going shopping, which should be an interesting experience. It is currently 2:30 in Winnipeg on a Saturday. And I am lying in my bed typing this, very Jet lagged at 10:30 at night. Still boggles my mind.

Prayer for:

-          We would overcome our jet lag and bounce back

-          Feeling a bit sick from the plane ride over so for health

-          For our first week and establishing new friendships

-          For our safety

-          That God would be near us at this time.

p.s. We could really feel the prayer on the way over here. So thank you SO much for everyone who is praying for us!

Miss you guys.

Carly Honeybunn

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Feb 12^th

Last night I didn’t sleep at all. It was so hot my bed was soaked; it was a very strange experience for me as I rarely sweat. There were also many strange noises too.

 Today Dan took Carleigh, Mel and I shopping into White River, he went to run some errands and Sonny, Dan and Jens middle son, stayed with us. It was pretty exciting for a first shopping experience; the only really hard part was converting Rands (South African Currency). Our bill came to 700 Rands, which is 30 Canadian dollars split between the 3 of us. 

We got orientated a little bit and got a phone which we will need  phone for texting, opening the gate and safety.

We had a quiet afternoon, Emily (Canadian volunteer from Calgary) took us on a little tour and we met a lot of people. Everybody is lovely and kind as well as very hospitable.

After that we made spaghetti for supper, we had to make our own sauce as they don’t have any to purchase in White River. It is mango season here so we ate those for dessert. Then we played a game of bananagrams, which wasn’t very successful as we were all still jet lagged… we made up a lot of words.

When we retired to our bedroom we found a fun surprise… a gecko! It took us 10 minutes to final get it out of the room so we could sleep. Of course there are still moths and frogs and spiders and snakes to worry about, I guess I am just a wimpy girly girl.

There is currently a group staying here from the UK, I am loving the accents, both the English and South African, I am already thinking in an accent

Quick description of some sights and sounds and smells:

-the air is very thick and humid

-smells like earth and rain

-a rooster wakes us up in the morning, literally with a “cock a doodle doo”

- Lots of random noises of bugs and other random things

- There are the most beautiful views from here of mountains and greenery. There is a mountain across from here called Legogote,  in English it means Lions head. I will be climbing that!

That is all I can remember about today.

Time for another sweaty hot and humid sleep! Wish me luck.

p.s. that’s another thing for prayer, that we would get lots of good sleep and get over our bug fears. It’s silly but it really does get in the way of our sleep.

p.p.s a frog just got in….

Carly Honeybunn

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Feb 13^th

Sanibonani (Hello)

I am trying to practice my Siswati. I am blogging by candle light with Mel. It has become our little routine. Today Dan took us gals to Mandlesive. Which is a small community, he taught us more about how Hands at work is run and it was so interesting and inspiring. We went to a CBO (Community based organization) which is basically a run by local volunteers from around the local church in the community who help give the 3ES (3 essential services) to the poorest of the poor. The three essential services are food, education and health and security. We met with some of these incredible local volunteers called “careworkers” who were getting ready to feed 75 orphans that day. I tried so hard to speak Siswati and butchered it badly; they were very gracious with me. I will have to start with some Xitsonga soon as that will be an asset for other community visits.

It’s been only 2 full days since I have been here and it feels like I have known these people my whole life. They are all so welcoming. There are 2 Canadian couples who have been here from 3-5 years, there are people from all over the world. It feels like a family already. This country is beautiful and captivating. I wish that everybody could be here and take it in. There is still so much to do and see.

I am so excited to be here, I already feel myself changing. It’s incredible, I feel so blessed to be here. I know it’s so early. But I actually could see myself living here for longer than 3 months!

What hands at work is doing is incredible and I feel so honored to be a part of it.

I could go on and on and on. I’m unsure about what to share and what not to, to me I just want everybody to feel like a part of everything.

Carly Honeybunn

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Feb 15^th

 Today was my 21^st birthday. It was amazing. I started the day off at small groups at Robyn and Sal’s house for small groups. They unexpectedly sang me happy birthday and gave me a cake.  Then I can down and a monkey had gotten into the kitchen. After that Dan and Lynn and Mel and Carleigh and I headed to the community based organization of Senzokhule. Lynn (A fellow Canadian) taught us all about Hands core values; he is a very amazing and gentle man.  We did our first home visits and it was very hard. I felt so stupid, I felt like I couldn’t say anything at all, I was lost for words. I felt awkward and it knocked me off my feet, I didn’t understand it. Dan and MaHelen and sisUnice and I went in a group and separated from Mel and Carleigh.  Our first visit was to a man named Darcy, He was in a wheel chair and living in a tiny brick house smaller than many bathrooms back home. He had been shot 18 times and the bullets remained in his body, I could see them under his thin skin. His care workers visit him and change his pamper and bring him water and care for his bed sores. He has no family, one son but he is not allowed to see him because he can’t afford to pay to marry the boy’s mother, so they can’t marry. We sat and talked with him and listened to his story, and then I prayed for him. I did the best I could although I felt inadequate and unworthy to pray for him.

 After Darcy, we visited a man with HIV AIDs and his granddaughter, she was 7 and she was beautiful. We chatted and prayed with him also.

My favorite visit of the day was when we visited a little girl who lived with her Gogo and 9 other brothers and sisters. She was about 10 and in a wheelchair, it seemed as though there was something else too, perhaps some type of mental disability, she was so smart though and spoke brilliant English, she looked mischievous. Dan made her guess my age and she guessed 10, he told her it was my birthday and she smiled and Dan asked her to sing, so in her living room she sang to me along with her Gogo and MaHelen and sisfortunate. It was the most meaningful I have ever heard “Happy Birthday” sung. I felt SO honored to hear her sing to me.

After we went back to the CBO and I met “Romeo” he was a boy about 16, he greeted all of us like such a little ladies man, it was so funny I loved it.

I feel like I could not possibly live my life the way I have been. I am changed now. Forever.

After that We all went to Tyler and Alisha’s (another Canadian Couple) for dinner, she had birthday balloons and some cake for  me , it was so cute, I just think, I was worried about not having  a good birthday for various reasons and it surpassed anything I could have imagined. I felt so much love. Thank you God.

Carly Honeybunn

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Hello Friends,
So...You may be wondering...Where are all the blog posts? Well the truth is we have been slacking, and the truth is that the internet access here is rather limited. So what does that mean for you? You loving supporter of the Carlyeighs in Africa... Rest assured that we have been writing material for the blog, but we have not had much opportunity to actually post it. So we will try to whenever we have the chance. Just a heads up that the posts may seem quite random. Carly may post 2 at a time from one week and Carleigh may post 1 from the week before. You never know what youre gunna get with the Carlyeighs. So please keep faithfully checking and hopefully we can get something on here that will be of interest to you.
Love,
The Carlyeighs

Hello Friends and Family,

This is Carly Alexandra Honeybunn and Carleigh Alexandra Wegner's official blog for our 2012 trip to South Africa. Here we will both be posting what we are experiencing throughout our time in South Africa. Sometimes we will post entries together, and other times just one of us will write. This way we will stay on top of it and share the responsibility.

As most of you know we will be going to Mpumalanga, White River, South Africa for 3 months. From February 9^th till May 11^th. We will be working with an organization called Hands at Work (website: http://www.handsatwork.org/). We are excited to be able to share this experience with you. Thank you so much for all of your love and support. Please remember us in prayer and keep checking our blog for updates. (We will try and email the posts as well)

Much Love,

The Carlyeighs